It's my favorite time of the week! Not only do I get to meet the challenge of writing a 100 word story to go with the photo prompt from Madison Woods, I'm privileged to enjoy stories written by other Friday Fictioneers as well.
Somewhere in the vicinity of the girl’s restroom a fire fighter found a melted disposable lighter but couldn’t say for sure it was the cause. By the time he found it flames had already licked, hissed and reduced the school to a charred heap.
Stunned faces, like gray balloons, floated single file through choking billows. Only one teacher perished. A hero.
“Tell that to his wife and baby son.” Angela’s cheeks blazed.
The next morning she watched a buzzard spread his wings on an incinerated branch. Nothing left to scavenge; he soared into the grief-stricken sky.
Angela never smoked again.
Sounds like a true story.
ReplyDeleteI'm not sure if I got this right, but did Angela start the fire (by mistake or on purpose)?
http://logo-ligi.com/2012/07/12/soliloquy-of-a-disgruntled-raven/
Thanks for commenting, Kwadwo,
DeleteI kind of leave it open ended. Angela could very well have started the fire but there's no way to know for sure.
Hello Rochelle,
DeleteYou commented on Madison's blog about having some difficulty in deleting your first entry on the InLinkz list.
You should see a red x on the right side of your name at both 23 and 25.
Click on the x by 23. It'll delete that entry.
Cheers!
Thanks, Kwadwo! My that was easy.
DeleteYou're most welcome.
Deletegut wrenching... every pang of nicotine want, a painful reminder... forever
ReplyDeletewell done
ReplyDeleteGood story, Rochelle. Arson, or even just an accidental incident causing a fire like that would be devastating enough. All the wildfires here in Co. have been so thoroughly investigated for those possibilities, and some in the past have been found to be either an arson case or incident involving carelessness, such as a careless camper.
ReplyDeleteI like it...not as in a pleasant, feel-good like, but as a thought-provoking, true-story like. Good job.
ReplyDeleteSounds like Angela is in for a life plagued by guilt if she's the one who caused the blaze. I do not envy her.
ReplyDeleteoh wow. great story Rochelle.
ReplyDeletehttp://writersclubkl.wordpress.com/2012/07/13/friday-fictioneers-the-river/
You hit a nerve Rochelle. Considering the current events and devastating wildfires lately, this touches too close to the truth. Good work. Thanks for visiting and commenting on mine.
ReplyDeleteGreat story! ...Strikes a mean cord. I've been trying to give up cigs for years! But, as a walking phlegm ball once said, "Either do or do not. There is no try." :) Anyway, check out mine, if you wish.
ReplyDeletehttp://crookseyeview.wordpress.com/2012/07/11/this-aint-deal-a-meal/
Powerful theme, nicely told. Liked it.
ReplyDeletehttp://castelsarrasin.wordpress.com/2012/07/13/every-cloud-friday-fictioneers-july-2012/
I'm disinclined to believe Angela was the one who did it. But maybe her comment about his family was a diversion tactic in the face of guilt. I liked how the buzzard was a symbol and not the focus.
ReplyDeleteMakes an impact! Hope it helps people stop smoking, or better yet, deters them from starting in the first place. Great story and great message.
ReplyDeletehttp://ebooksscifi.wordpress.com/2012/07/12/malignant-narcissist-by-ilyan-kei-lavanway-for-madison-woods-friday-fictioneers-100-word-flash-fiction/
A powerfully-written tale, and I feel a deep sadness etched into the community. "Grief-stricken sky" is a great line.
ReplyDeleteThanks for your comment on mine.
http://www.lazuli-portals.com/flash-fiction/tideline-transition
Dear Rochelle,
ReplyDeleteYou're going to have to change you blog/bio intro now! Ha! Congratulations again.
The last line of your story so excellently tied things up that I read the whole story again just to experience the ride. Grim, sad, poignant and so, so true to your characters. Great job.
Thank you for visiting Roadkill and commenting so nicely. My link below is for others still smoking.
Aloha,
Doug
http://ironwoodwind.wordpress.com/2012/07/13/roadkill/
Powerful, evocative and a lesson learnt. Good shot. Mine is here: http://readinpleasure.wordpress.com/2012/07/13/fridayfictioneers-spectators/
ReplyDeleteThat gray balloons line was great.
ReplyDeleteI never understood the fascination with smoking in the bathroom... What a powerful story Rochelle. I pity the bird most though, the hunting ground it used to haunt are now gone. Mine is over here and on the list. http://remakingme-atiyatownes.blogspot.com/2012/07/friday-fictioneers-for-power.html
ReplyDeleteI liked how this one snuck up on me. I wasn't expecting the last line, and it made me go back and re-evaluate the narrator's role in the fire. Great piece!
ReplyDeletecheers,
Lorelei
www.westcoastwriters.blogspot.com
Nice construction, well rounded story with a punch. Well done and all the best with your writing.
ReplyDeletehttp://wp.me/s1nUrn-buzzard
The tone of this story read the recollections of a trauma victim. Which is a tone I LOVED. The third person took me out of it a little bit, however. I think the punch would have been harder in the first person.
ReplyDeleteBut as it is, it is a *very* strong piece. Well done!
This is my link: http://quillshiv.com/2012/07/12/lady-of-war/
A lesson hard learned, indeed. Well written! Thank you for sharing.
ReplyDelete~Susan (www.susanwenzel.com)
Rocks!
ReplyDeleteEnjoyed your story. Looking forward to the next one.
This one was brilliant. Good plot and very well-written. With the added bit at the end, which was a surprise. I like it very much.
ReplyDeleteGreat story! Well done!
ReplyDeleteYes, well, smoking does kill, doesn't it? Usually in a more insidious manner. Will Angela ever come clean?
ReplyDeleteCongratulations on the book, Rochelle. That's a huge accomplishment and I'm very happy for you!
ReplyDeleteNow, back to the story. The title, "Arson" would imply that the fire was intentional. The last line leads me to believe that she is sorry for the consequences of her actions. Quite a compelling little tale.
Thanks for the nice comment on mine. Here's the link for other buzzard lovers. http://russellgayer.blogspot.com/
Nicely done, She will have a hard time sleeping at night with that guilt. Thank you for stopping by my place and the kind words.
ReplyDeleteHere is mine for others to read yaralwrites.com
What guilt she must feel. Strong emotional story, Rochelle.
ReplyDeleteI suspect Angela did something to start the fire.
ReplyDeleteI said "Ohhh" aloud when I read that last line about Angela's cigarette. Very powerful. Well done, Rochelle.
ReplyDeleteThanks for your nice comments about mine and congrats on landing an agent!
http://banterwithbeth.blogspot.com